Losing Hope
by Kotoette
Summary: Everything seemed over for Xephos, right at the very end. Honeydew needed to pull him out of his fear and doubt, even if he had to drag him through the Nether. Yogscast related, of course. Rated T for language.
1. Chapter 1

**This is a rewrite of a monologue I wrote about the Shadow of Israphel characters losing faith in themselves. That's basically all there is in here. I'm not good at writing angst or emotions in general, not to mention it's probably _incredibly_ OOC, but I really like how I wrote this. I hope anyone reading does too.**

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><p>He was just about ready to give up.<p>

If it weren't for his dwarf friend, Honeydew, keeping him sane – and occasionally driving him insane – they wouldn't have ended up here in the first place. They would have never awoken some sort of ancient evil, they would have never caused this.

For what felt like the very first time, Xephos felt guilty. Yes, he had doubts before. Yes, he'd wanted to give up before, but it didn't compare to _this_, and for the definite first time in his life, he wanted to give up and let Israphel win.

So he asked, "Is there a point to any of this?"

Honeydew turned to face him, looking up to see his blue eyes, the fear and doubt shone in them. Honeydew knew what his friend was feeling. He was feeling it too, just by looking at him, but being the hardy dwarf that he was, he held it in.

Xephos continued with his doubts, "I don't think we should go on. There's nothing here for us anymore."

Honeydew had to do something to bring his friend out of his negative emotions.

"Look," Honeydew began, "you and I both know that if we give up, the world will end, we will die, and he will win."

Of course, Xephos already knew this, and being reminded seemed to make it worse. Honeydew had to try harder.

"Do you want him to win?" Honeydew asked. Xephos shook his head, and Honeydew feigned a smile. "I didn't think so."

"We need this," Honeydew said, trying to motivate Xephos, "We need to save the world! We started this, and I'm going to end it, and I can't do that alone."

"We're dealing with a power so great that it threatens to obliterate the ground we walk on, in this present moment. We have been shown the future, and it was not a pretty site." Honeydew stopped for a second, letting Xephos get a word in.

"And standing around isn't making the situation better." Xephos looked around him, they were so close, so close to finding and defeating Israphel. "If we fail..."

"If we fail," Honeydew continued, "We would fail the world." Those words didn't seem to make Xephos feel any better, Honeydew was starting to feel the same, but at least one of them knew that they could not, and _would not_ give up until it was done. "Basically, hope is riding on our shoulders, and you want to give that up? You want to throw away the hope of so many?"

"Why?"

Xephos was silent. He appeared to be in deep thought about what his dwarf friend meant. Suddenly, he explained his reasons in a loud outburst. "Because there is no hope! There is no hope for any of us! Why did we ever get involved?"

"We didn't know any better!" Was Honeydew's only answer. Xephos scowled, "That's no excuse!"

"Why did we ever build that portal? If we hadn't come here, if we had just continued our lives without ever building that stupid gate in the first place, we wouldn't be where we are now." Xephos continued to shout.

Honeydew tried his best to find the positives in all of this, "If we had just minded our own business, we wouldn't have met Peculier, Lysander, and the others."

It didn't seem to work on Xephos. "There wouldn't have been so many deaths or kidnappings. Like, Granny Bacon and Daisy!" Honeydew remembered Granny Bacon. It stung. "But we wouldn't have been made out to be heroes -"

Xephos interrupted him, "We aren't _heroes_! We never were!"

Xephos stopped to look around again, they were in the Nether, following a path of nether brick to the core of the corruption himself. On their way, everything went wrong. Daisy was found dead, leaving Peculier to completely stop functioning emotionally. They left him behind. Lysander never appeared, and neither did the pirates. It seemed that Israphel was going to win by default through emotion, the bastard. That pale faced, mute, stalker. Son of a lost, insane man.

Xephos had to admit, for a literal walking corpse, Israphel did a pretty good job at destroying them all from the inside and out. He didn't know why he was even trying anymore, aside from the fact that he was drafted into this. He just wanted to take that same, torn map, and rip it into even tinier pieces, so that they could never be found again.

Honeydew knew that the doubt was creeping on both of them, he resorted to the last uplifting line he could think of, "Yet here we are, being heroes, just like we were meant to be."

"Why are we here, you ask?" Honeydew pulled Xephos along the path, the doubt disappearing, slowly but surely. "...We're here to save the world."

"_And that's just what we'll do!"_


	2. Chapter 2  Alternate Ending

**Thanks for all the reviews! I felt like rewriting the last bit, it's a bit more comical and possibly more in-character for them. The downside is that doesn't allow for different genres each chapter (which I don't blame them for. All stories have to fit to a certain theme sometimes.)**

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><p>He was just about ready to give up.<p>

If it weren't for his dwarf friend, Honeydew, keeping him sane – and occasionally driving him insane – they wouldn't have ended up here in the first place. They would have never awoken some sort of ancient evil, they would have never caused this.

For what felt like the very first time, Xephos felt guilty. Yes, he had doubts before. Yes, he'd wanted to give up before, but it didn't compare to _this_, and for the definite first time in his life, he wanted to give up and let Israphel win.

So he asked, "Is there a point to any of this?"

Honeydew turned to face him, looking up to see his blue eyes, the fear and doubt shone in them. Honeydew knew what his friend was feeling. He was feeling it too, just by looking at him, but being the hardy dwarf that he was, he held it in.

Xephos continued with his doubts, "I don't think we should go on. There's nothing here for us anymore."

Honeydew had to do something to bring his friend out of his negative emotions.

"Look," Honeydew began, "you and I both know that if we give up, the world will end, we will die, and he will win."

Of course, Xephos already knew this, and being reminded seemed to make it worse. Honeydew had to try harder.

"Do you want him to win?" Honeydew asked. Xephos shook his head, and Honeydew smiled. "I didn't think so."

"We need this," Honeydew said, trying to motivate Xephos, "We need to save the world! We started this, and I'm going to end it, and I can't do that alone."

"We're dealing with a power so great that it threatens to obliterate the ground we walk on, in this present moment. We have been shown the future, and it was not a pretty site." Honeydew stopped for a second, letting Xephos get a word in.

"And standing around isn't making the situation better." Xephos said, looking around him. They were so close, so close to finding and defeating Israphel. "If we fail..."

"If we fail," Honeydew continued, "then... there will be no more Jaffa Cakes!" Those words seemed to make Xephos feel a little better, in fact, he laughed. Honeydew didn't really understand what made him laugh, but then he realized. Jaffa Cakes make for some good humor, and he laughed too.

Xephos stopped laughing to look around again, and he frowned. They were in the Nether, following a path of nether brick to the core of the corruption himself. On their way, everything went wrong. Daisy was found dead, leaving Peculier to completely stop functioning emotionally. They left him behind. Lysander never appeared, and neither did the pirates. It seemed that Israphel was going to win by default through emotion, the bastard. That pale faced, mute, stalker. Son of a lost, insane man.

Xephos had to admit, for a literal walking corpse, Israphel did a pretty good job at destroying them all from the inside and out. But now, Xephos refused to give up, and swore that Israphel would pay for what he'd done to all the others. Xephos ran along the path, and Honeydew followed. Until they stopped.

"Where are we going?" Xephos asked.

"...We're going to save the world!" Honeydew shouted. Xephos smiled, "I knew you were going to say that!"

And so they did.


End file.
